For some couples, choosing the song for their first dance together at their wedding is easy; it’s the first song they danced to, the song that was playing when they met, the song from their first date.  For others, it’s not so easy.  We’ve helped numerous couples set a play list for their wedding, and their first dance.  Here are a few ways we’ve seen couples pick that perfect wedding first dance song—and tips we’ve given them to find the first dance song they both love.

Choose a song you can dance to

If you’ve spent the last few months in dance lessons, listen carefully to the songs at your lessons.  Talk to your dance instructor for ideas or select the song that you both love to dance to.  If you have a particular dance that you both enjoy, look through a library of music with the beat that fits with your favorite dance.

Find a song with family meaning

Choosing your first song can be a symbolic way of honoring your family legacy, or a family member who is special to both of you.  Ask your parents, grandparents, or other special family members for the first song they danced to at their wedding or a song that has special meaning to them.  You can keep the source of your special first song confidential, or ask your DJ or band leader to do a special announcement honoring your family member.

Choose a song that fits with your wedding atmosphere

Another source of first song inspiration is all that wedding planning you’ve immersed yourself in for the past few months.  If you’ve gone to great lengths to plan a vintage wedding with touches from a certain era, choose a song from that decade that resonates with your wedding atmosphere and who you are as a couple.  For a beach wedding or nautical-themed wedding, look for songs that fit with your décor, coordinated menu, and special memories together as a couple.

Ask your DJ

It’s your DJ’s job to know the perfect music to keep your guests dancing (note, your guests not just a general play list-here’s how to select a good DJ that does customize their wedding play list), so why not tap into their knowledge of good wedding dance songs?  Don’t be afraid to ask your DJ for recommendations for a first dance song that fits your wedding and who you are as a couple; they’ll be glad to lend their expertise to your cause.

Find commonality

Have a conversation with your fiance to find a commonality: a genre of music you both like, a favorite shared movie (and movie sound track), music that you both enjoy together during a past time (playing sports, going to musicals, etc.), anything that may point you to a common song that has special meaning.

Go back to those special relationship moments

The song didn’t have to be playing in the background during special moments in your relationship; it can fit the feeling of the day you met, the nature of your blind date, or the moment you knew your fiance was the one.

Break the mold

If a sappy love song doesn’t fit who you are as a couple, don’t feel like you have to choose it as your wedding first dance song.  Choose what first dance song fits you as a couple and enjoy it.  This is your wedding day!